The Reality Show Drinking Game

Rupaul’s Drag Race is now available on Netflix and over the last few weeks I have re-watched every season. Sad I know, but regular readers know how much I was obsessed the first time I saw it so a re-watch was inevitable. While listening to the contestants’ interviews it occurred to me that there must be a drinking game that viewers could play which is applicable to all reality shows. When you think about it it makes perfect sense; contestants invariably repeat the same hackneyed sound-bites and if you’ve watched a couple of series you can usually predict what people are going to say.

I put forward this idea on Facebook and many of the responses highlighted phrases I hadn’t even clocked. So as a result of this crowdsourcing I’m hereby creating the Reality Show Drinking Game. And it’s my gift to you, not just for Christmas, forever!

The Rules of the Reality Show Drinking Game

As many players as you like. As many bottles as you like, but they must be spirits/hard liquor – none of your beer bullshit. Last person standing wins.

(Terms and Conditions apply. Alex Donald will not be responsible for hospitalisations as a result of playing.)

  • One shot every time someone says “This is my time to shine.”
  • One shot every time someone says “I need to step up my game.”
  • One shot every time someone says “I have to be true to myself.”
  • One shot every time someone says “I AM [America’s Next Top Model/The Biggest Loser/insert title here].”
  • One shot every time someone says “I’m not here to make friends.” Seriously, there’s a whole video devoted to this one. 
  • Two shots if you spot something over the top and concocted solely for drama and subsequent ratings surge: Tyra’s “I was rooting for you” tiradeWillam being disqualified from Rupaul’s Drag Race.
  • Two shots every time someone says something so ridiculous it reduces viewers to head-scratching incomprehension, e.g. “I need to take a swim in Lake Me.”
  • Two shots every time someone says something so moronic you wonder and worry about their IQ level. For example, years ago I was watching America’s Next Top Model and one of the contestants, when watching Tyra Banks on the runway, said “It’s just amazing to see someone who’s been walking that long.” And then there was Jessica Simpson’s inability to distinguish between chicken and tuna. You get the picture.

And then there’s this guy. This is THE BEST exit from a reality show, especially his monkey impression. Werd.

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